Limerick to obtain gunbarrels for HNLMS Tromp before D-day

[HWTD]

Somewhere in a book I have read the entire limerick that went through the official Royal Navy channels to obtain new gunbarrels for HNLMS Tromp just before D-day. A few examples of this limerick are in the book "Verdreven, doch niet verslagen", however in that book, not the entire limerick was printed. Can anyone help me to the entire limerick?

Much obliged,

HWTD

[Paul Konings]

Hi,

The guns where not for Hr. Ms. Tromp but for the gunsloop Hr. Ms. Soemba, sistership of Hr. Ms. Flores, both also known as "The Terrible Twin".

Found through google at netherlandsnavy.nl:

A report has come in from the Soemba,
That their salvoes go off like a Rhumba,
Two guns, they sound fine,
But the third five point nine,
He am bust and refuse to go boomba.


D. of P. and D.G.D. referred for information
D.D.O.D.(M) added to the marking as a mark of courtesy.


A.D. Nicholl,
Director of Operations Division (Foreign)




This is very grave news from the Soemba,
Whose guns are all needed to go boomba,
On a fast nearing day -
Though we cannot say
When exactly will rise the balloonba.


R.K. Dickson
Director of Plans.




Best Plans! Where childlike learning sits
Remote from worldly cares
And leaves to skilled Division its Administry affairs
(With apologies to Oriel College)


C.C. Hughes Hallett,
Director of Plans (Q)




These ersats-made guns of the Soemba's
D.G.D. has said times without numbers,
If OPS want nice pops,
At the Huns, then these guns,
Must be changed for some British made Boombas.


V.C. Begg
Gunnery and Anti-Aircraft Warfare




It is agreed (in every quarter)
That to get results you oughter,
Make the boomba under water.
As Gun-Boombas aren't my line
I suggest she tries a Mine.


John Cowie
Director of Operations Division (Mining)




To find any Yard for the Soemba
We've searched from the Clyde to the Hoomba
But we haven't got room
For Van Tromp's ruddy Broom
Much less for this useless old Loomba


Returned to D.O.D. (F) with the compliments of the Emergency "Despair" Section.
G.A. Bassett
For Director of Dockyards




This dreadful affair of the Soemba
Is really too hard for a "Plumber"
Referred with a laugh
Straight back to the Staff
for the personal care of E-Loemba.


Olivir Bevir
Director of Naval Ordnance




I hasten to say
In no uncertain way
That my personal cares
Are as few as my hairs.
With some satisfaction
I note proposed action
And pass for notation
With gratification.


E.M. Evans-Lombe
Director of Gunnery and Anti-Aircraft Warfare




Soemba has awakened the Staff from repose,
I am amazed, all the same, that they do not propose
To allocate Soemba with modification
(Soft velvet chairs the one stipulation)
To the "Overlord" plan for accommodation
Though some of the minutes are just on the verge
I note with regret no proposals emerge.
I can only assume that the Staff and Soemba
Have returned with with relief to their usual Sloemba.


A.B. Cunningham
First Sea Lord




To the foregoing notes on the Soemba
Which imply she is now a back Noemba
You must pay no regard, For she's got to bombard
(As is very well known to E-Loemba).


E.N. Syfret
Vice-Chief of Naval Staff.




After so much backchat it is but right
That Soemba should join in this fight
Because she loves very much
To be rude too, and in Dutch.
So no one can read it, serve you right!

Waarom wordt nog niet begonnen
Met verwisselen der kanonnen?
Rijmpjes maken helpt geen zier
Want met pen, inkt en papier
Werd geen oorlog ooit gewonnen


Van Holthe
Dutch Naval Liaison Officer in Defence of H.N.M.S. "Soemba"


Free translation by D.O.D. (F)
Temporary interpreter in Double Dutch (unpaid)

Oh why have you not yet begun
The exchange of (above-mentioned) gun?
How can rhymes help you when,
No ink, paper or pen
Have ever a (bally) war won.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Note from publishing webmaster
This article is a reproduction of the entire original article published in The Navy of March, 1952. Alterations of the original article have only been made with regards to the lay-out, the contents above are otherwise original.

regards,

Paul Konings

[Visje]

Hi Paul,

You may want to mention where you found the limerck

(that would be my site http://www.netherlandsnavy.nl)

Jan

[Paul Konings]

Jan,

Corrections in place. Mea culpa.

mvg,

Paul

[Leen van Heeren]

Jan,

Corrections in place. Mea culpa.

mvg,

Paul

HMS Tromp has never served in de Europian area during WW 2

Leen

Former Gunnery CPO

[Willem Cool]

The replacement gunbarrels were obtaind from the obsolete cruiser Hr.Ms. Sumatra, which was
later sunk at Normandy as part of a "Wave-barrier" among other obsolete ships to provide shelter
against incoming waves and to protect thuswise the "Mullberry harbour" at Quisterham, 10 KM north of Caen.